Resolutions or Reparations
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Here we are, a few days into the new year and you might already be beating yourself up about that list of resolutions you haven't started or that beautiful vision board that's already collecting dust and about to find a home in the back of the closet. Friend, we've all been there! No, for real - we've literally all been there. OK most of us have been there. Research shows 95% of people don't complete their new year's resolutions, so why do we insist on putting ourselves through this annual torture?
Because that's the way we've always done it?
Because that's what our social circles do?
Because New Year, New Me!
Because we want to have a response when a colleague says, "what's your #1 resolution?"
Because we need something to talk to our gym buddies, bible study group, carpool pals about?
Enough! I'm calling for an end to the cycle of self loathing, self shaming and feeling bad about ourselves for not completing yet another list.
Instead, I challenge you to think about where you might owe yourself reparations. Before we scoff at the word, let's consider the definition:
Reparation (noun) rep.a.ra.tion
- A repairing or keeping in repair
- The act of making amends
- The payment of damages
Reflection: Think about the past year, in what ways have you not fully honored yourself and your needs? What relationships with yourself do you need to repair?
This could show up in ways such as not taking your vitamins or prescribed medications, staying up late / not getting enough sleep, not following your spiritual practice / attending church, not spending time in nature or doing a hobby that you enjoy. Perhaps it's skipping out on gym time or weekly brunch with friends, too much physical clutter in your space, a few too many Netflix binges. Big or small, you can't fix what you don't face, so identify it - no one needs to know but you. How do you need to make amends to yourself?
The reason 95% of people don't complete their resolutions is because they're trying to do all the things at one time. Consider repairing just ONE of the areas you identified. Be kind to yourself, carve out 15-30 minutes 2-3 times a week to repair an area that's most meaningful to you and will refresh and nourish your mind, body and soul. Gain traction in a single area and build from there. Let that one good thing propel you to another. You can do it!
Be well friends,
Coach T
